Crying in public places

Here is a list of the public places I cried in yesterday:

1. Front porch

2. Parking lot

3. Restaurant

4. Street

5. Bus stop

6. Restaurant #2

There is something very honest in allowing yourself to cry in a public place. While I was completely mortified at the lack of control I was exercising over my emotions, I also felt, in a shameless, self indulgent kind of way, completely and utterly free. It was as if I was reverting back to a time of childlike innocence when I didn't understand what emotional hurt was. And was surprised by it.

Despite the constant tears streaming from my smudged eyes (I made the mistake of wearing mascara yesterday, one I did not repeat today), I was able to observe the reactions of the people that surrounded me. Most people either stared or pretended not to notice. There were a few dirty looks directed at my friend and a busker wished me a good day from his microphone before he proceeded to lose himself in his violin.

So here is what I am puzzling about. Why is it so taboo for someone to cry in public? Why does this certain display of emotion make us, as a society, so uncomfortable? Why is it considered pathetic and undesirable? As blessed as I am with the life that I lead I still experience periods of unhappiness and instead of hiding what I feel I have decided to whole heartedly embrace this crushing feeling of loss (and consequently share it with one thousand strangers on Granville street). It is what it is.

7. Airport.

Goodbye Vancouver.